Hey Vegeta! What does the Alphachron say about his power level?

May 13, 2008 /

Slashdot just posted an article about how NASA are considering using an australian-developed piece of technology to look for signs of life on Mars.

This tech is called the “Alphachron”.

The Alphachron can not a real thing, dammit. Something called an Alphachron is ..is…well it’s what the decepticons are trying to steal from the Autobots. It’s what Naruto has to protect from evil ninjas. A couple of reposession men are driving around a car with an Alphachron in the trunk. It’s in a crate next to the Ark. Nubile young manga teens fly huge anthropomorphic robots because of the Alphachron, eventually merging with it and forcing humanity to evolve into a supreme being composed entirely of love.

The Alphachron should certainly not be made by Australians.

Categories: From The Unfathomable Mind of JSR

7 Comments

  1. exogenesis

    May 13, 2008 at 9:45 am

    Damn, I was sure I had a Betachron or 2 stashed in the back of the wardrobe just waiting for my huge anthropomorphic robot to arrive…

    Darn Australians, have to outdo me everytime

  2. shoei_mike

    May 13, 2008 at 10:35 pm

    Some guy offered me a deal on a second hand Gammachron, but that particular green clashes with the colour scheme on my Blade Liger.

  3. isaacfreeman

    May 14, 2008 at 1:00 am

    See, the thing is that there are large deposits of cislatium ore in Western Australia that naturally emit alphachronic psi-radiation. The Aborigines have known about it for thousands of years, noting there are certain places dingos won’t go, due to their natural psitropic sensitivities. Certain kinds of marsupials also age backwards in these areas.

    So it wasn’t that the Alphachron was invented in Australia so much as that it was dug up there. But they put it into a shiny box with lights on so that people don’t ask awkward questions about the eerie silence and all the nosebleeds.