I saw a fascinating little vignette[1] take place outside the curry shop where I was buying dinner.  It featured three participants. Let’s call them Bogan Dude, Well-Groomed Guy, and Friendly-Looking Girl.

The three of them are on their way somewhere, in no hurry. They’re all obviously friends, laughing and talking. Bogan Dude is cracking jokes, interestingly directing them at Friendly-Looking Girl, rather than Well-Groomed Guy. They’ve had a few drinks.

Friendly girl produces a necklace, and asks Well-Groomed guy to help her put it on. While he does so, Bogan Dude laughs and says “Puttin’ on girls jewlery, FAGGOTY FAG!”

So, some points:

(1) Friendly-Looking Girl could have put that on herself. But instead she asked Well-Groomed Guy to “help” by putting it on her.

(2) In order to do this, Friendly-Looking Girl had to press her back and ass up against the front of Well-Groomed Guy, and also pull her long hair aside, bend her head forward and expose her neck to Well-Groomed guy, who had to put his arms around her to arrange the necklace before fixing the clasp. [2]

(3) Well-Groomed Guy could get it from Friendly-Looking Girl. 100%. FACT. And judging by the way he rather slowly put the thing on her, and his focus while he did so, he is fully agreeable with this concept.

(4) That Bogan Dude doesn’t see this means that he is apparently the least observant person in the universe when it comes to body language, or maybe he just doesn’t want to see it. If forced to bet either way, my money would be on the latter.

That’s it, that’s the whole story. They wandered off down the road. For a moment, I felt a bit bad for Bogan Dude, but hey, he’s the kind of guy that uses “Faggoty Fag” as an insult, so you know what fuck him, I hope he walks in on Well-Groomed Guy doing Friendly Girl from behind. And doing her well.

[1] Yep. I think I did.

[2] And I’m not even going to get into the symbolism of a girl asking a dude to put a chain around her in the first place.