MonthMay 2007

Buhbye

Jerry Fallwell, founder of the Moral Majority, is dead.

And good riddance. The man was a poster child for everything I dislike about fundementalist cultists. He was an intolerant, hateful, hyprocritical little man, and the world is a better, brighter place without him.

Some choice quotes from the Rev. Jerry Fallwell:


The Bible is the inerrant … word of the living God. It is absolutely infallible,without error in all matters pertaining to faith and practice, as well as in areas such as geography, science, history, etc.

AIDS is the wrath of a just God against homosexuals. To oppose it would be like an Israelite jumping in the Red Sea to save one of Pharoah’s chariotters.

AIDS is not just God’s punishment for homosexuals; it is God’s punishment for the society that tolerates homosexuals.

The ACLU is to Christians what the American Nazi party is to Jews.

[On the subject of the Terrorist attacks in New York on Sept 11, 2001] I really believe that the pagans, and the abortionists, and the feminists, and the gays and the lesbians who are actively trying to make that an alternative lifestyle, the ACLU, People for the American Way — all of them who have tried to secularize America — I point the finger in their face and say, “You helped this happen.”

We’re fighting against humanism, we’re fighting against liberalism … we are fighting against all the systems of Satan that are destroying our nation today … our battle is with Satan himself.

But these things speak evil of those things, verse 10 [reading from Jude] which they know not: but what they know naturally, as brute beasts, in those things they corrupt themselves. Look at the Metropolitan Community Church today, the gay church, almost accepted into the World Council of Churches. Almost, the vote was against them. But they will try again and again until they get in, and the tragedy is that they would get one vote. Because they are spoken of here in Jude as being brute beasts, that is going to the baser lust of the flesh to live immorally, and so Jude describes this as apostasy. But thank God this vile and satanic system will one day be utterly annihilated and there’ll be a celebration in heaven.

If you’re not a born-again Christian, you’re a failure as a human being.

This Will End Well

So, back in the day there was a video game called Star Control, which I played a lot, as well as a sequel called Star Control II which was GENIUS BRILLIANT GAMEPLAY FOR THE WIN LOL and which I played even more.

One of the ships from this game was the Ilwrath Avenger, which had as a main weapon a very high-damage, absurdly short range, plasma gun. The way to fight the Avenger was to stay the hell away at all times and fire long range weapons at it until it died. Anyway, a certain picture from the intro to the game which always made me smile was a shot of a decloaked Ilwrath with main gun firing, and you could just make out the figure of some other sort of ship that’s right next to the Avengers main plasma emitter, and is thus melting hideously in the superhot beam of flaming death. But the funny part was that also in this picture was an arrow pointed at the other ship and the caption text on the arrow placidly states… “Tactically Poor Position”

Hah! It’s making me smile again just thinking about it.

Anyway, I saw a picture today that made me recall this wonderful image from the past. Here it is.

epic03-04forksFAIL

Now, note from the shadow and the inclination of the bike with respect to the ground that this gentleman is in the middle of a front wheelie, or a “stoppie” if I may use the vernacular from back in my bikin’ days. These are performed by applying the front brakes hard enough, while at speed, to cause the rear end to stand up. I never had the balls to try this, but I had friends who managed it. Note also that this particular picture has been snapped at the precise moment where the physical stresses of this maneuver have exceeded the operational and/or material tolerances of the motorcycles front wheel assembly.

Further points to note carefully:

– Firstly, the lack of a leather jacket, or gloves.
– Secondly, the lack of a full-face helmet.
– Thirdly, the lack of ANY kind of helmet.
– Fourthly, you can’t see, but fuck, why not, he’ll be wearing jandals or be barefoot or something, he’s that kind of guy.
– Fifthly, the location of his scrotum, compared to say .. the handlebars and/or the pointy bits of fibreglass fairing.
– Sixthly, and perhaps most importantly, THE EXPRESSION ON HIS FACE.

Have you noted all these elements? Do you appreciate the precise timing of this image? Do you understand the story, NAY, the SAGA that this image is the mere precursor thereof?

Tactically.

Poor.

Position.