MonthJanuary 2007

Poppers

Ikea sell pretty much the exact desk I’m looking for, adjustable to a wide range of heights, including the all-important standing up one. And it’s quite cheap. I shall await their Auckland store opening with anticipation.

I was reading a local Auckland magazine in the cafe today, while waiting for my lunch. It had 4 or 5 pages of those “social scene” photographs. You know. “Ms Emily Smythe-Smith-Smithe and Mr Tarquin Chinless-Daterape are shown enjoying a private joke.” That kinda thing.

Anyway, based on the pictures I saw, I just wanted to say that if any of the items listed below apply to your preferred outfit for an evenings clubbing then I, personally, genuinely, seriously, want you to die. In a fire.

– Pastel Shirts. Unbuttoned too far.
– Bling. Involving Crucifices.
– All The Hair Gel In The World.
– Sunglasses on. Inside.
– A popped collar. Just .. No. Fuck. No. No-one looks cool with a popped collar. No-one has EVER looked cool with a popped collar[1]. No-one EVER WILL look cool with a popped collar. DON’T BE THAT GUY.

Thank you for your time.

[1] Except Elvis. And you ain’t him.

Enlycra’d

Last night I went to the Hysteria bar on K road to see the Masters of Metal. I hadn’t actually seen this band before, but reviews from my friends were positive, along the lines of:

“OH EM GEE you haven’t seen MoM? [Throws up horns and assumes rock hero pose and 80’s falsetto scream] “You willll love iiittttttt-ah!’….”

So anyway, along I went. MoM are four dudes, probably around my age, fairly rotund gentlemen, dressed in 80’s metal clothes – heavy on the lycra and leopardskin, spiked cuffs, cucumbers down the pants and spiky codpieces. The hugely puffy fluffy wigs and occasional headband completed their various ensembles JUST SO.

And they brought the rock. Oh yes.

They played a whole bunch of 80’s rock and metal. And they played like MEN. That is, sweatily and with much grunting. I am sore in a variety of places today; my feet hurt a lot, from standing up for hours. My neck hurts from headbanging. Luckily my hair has grown back out far enough that I can actually throw it around these days. Even the horn-throwing muscles in my hands hurt slightly.

Hugely awesome. Highly recommend. I shall definitely be attending future gigs.

The use of “i” as a prefix

So, the iPhone.

Until I realised that it didn’t have 3G capability (only GPRS/GSM) I actually had nothing less than a VISCERAL NEED for one of these devices after watching the keynote speech. The physical and logical UI looks _that_ slick. Oh Lord, does it look nice.

However, no 3G? Really? That means no sale. And bear in mind that (a) I’m sick of carrying both a PDA/Phone and an iPod, and (b) there’s that VISCERAL NEED WANT OOO BABY LOOK AT YOU response to the UI again.

By the time they release them here in NZ, I hope they’ve upgraded the hardware to ensure that it can deal with modern cellular protocols. Also, 8GB? _Enough_, but really, Apple, you can do better than that.

I have nothing but the highest hopes for V2. And if I am offered a free V1 iPhone, I will certainly take it.