MonthMay 2008


Allow me to express my opinion of the Iron Man movie in cupcake form…

Best. Superhero. Movie. Ever.

And if you didn’t stay ’till the very end after the credits, it sucks to be you.

Questions Asked, Answers Given

The office manager at [Employer] sent out an email offering prizes to employees for correctly answering a series of questions related to office protocols and policies. Here are the questions, and my responses (in bold):

1. Give the full names of 3 [Employer] Board Members

John, Paul and Ringo

2. Where is the accident register kept?

Behind the hot water pipes in the upstairs toilet

3. Who is responsible for investigating accidents?

That guy from CSI:Miami. You know, with the sunglasses.

4. Where is the fire assembly point?

The ConFireCo Factory. Recently outsourced to China. Chinese kids can assemble fires at a fraction of the cost of domestic workers, so outsourcing is the only sound fiscal response. We have to enhance shareholder value!

5. List the 6 [Employer] values

Speed of light in a vacuum, the golden ratio, the Bohr radius, the Natural Log base, the mass of an electron, and Pi.

6. Who is responsible for tidying the kitchen?

[Name of Office Manager] or Magic Kitchen Elves.

I also added:

Can’t wait to see what I’ve won!

Her response was:

See if you do better with this riddle. It starts with f and ends with l

I like working here.

Blerk Flerg

Just got back from the Henry Rollins spoken word gig.

Henry Rollins is brilliant.

That is all. Continue about your business.

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